Will tomorrow a better day?...

I felt very down on my work last week. I have been demotivated for nearly 8 months since July 2006. But it really hit me on last Wednesday, i think i hit the bottom (still not sure) if you look at my motivation graph. My working life sucks... direction is not clear... :-) The things that hit me is that I have been influenced my current boss to assign me the deliverable / job that i shall be able to perform to exceed expectation with my strength but my requests were consistently turned down. The reasons that she gave me are that she needs a person to solve problems and problems etc .... (lists/tans for excuses... i would not wanna to bore you ... :-) )

Until last Wednesday, i was extremely down after realizing my boss is still not sure which group and focus area that she is going to assign me even until today. BTW, i realized all my collagues have their focus areas and group assigned. Boss! are you hinting me to leave the company? If yes, please say it directly... i could take it :-)

FYI, there will be another round of re-org next week. Until today, i don't have a clue where i'm going to end up and no news from my current boss. Don't mention on what project/program i'm going to work on... So how do you feel if you are in my postion ... ?

Guess what? That's one comment that i heard from my US collague / group lead over here whom work with the US folks. "Two managers in US (Ex-boss & boss that borrow 50% of my resource currently) are fighting for my resource for their group." Is this true or just to delight me ???? Anyway, i only belief 60% of the comment. You know what, i'm having 50% of my resource loan to a project to help the team to solve gaps/challenges posted by their customers. I managed to convince the customers team that gave up on this project to come back and work with the development team ... Yippe... what an accomplishment... hehehe... :-) On the other hand, i'm currently helping my ex-US Boss to organize information for managment decision for the future projcets/programs. :-> You must be thinking that with these accomplishments i should be happy and satisfy but in fact i could only see the current not the future. This is what upset me most... :'(

Finally, my ex-US Boss approached me on last Thursday, I felt more comfortable and delight as i know that my ex-US Boss is requesting my current boss for my full resource on undertaking couples of challenging projects /programs which tab into my strength as well as providing a working ground for me to grow... hehehe.... I like Challenges :-)