Errrrr... Maybe it's a emo season now... Everyone surrounded me were very emo... As all of you know i was supposed to start my project on April 7th 2009 @ Kampala, Uganda, Africa... This morning when i woke up... what i saw was this
Instead the view i should have seen is
errrrrr... why why why~ Why i need to always right here Waiting... *sobsob* Besides, looking @ one year back, when i was still attached with the big corporation... my life was so so soooo different and i was so motivated to move forward. I set goals that i wanted in my life. I always learnt as much as i could from doing the job... I marched forward to achieve my goal... Nothing seems to be the obstacles on blocking me from achieving my goal...
Today, I just lost whatever i had in the past... I feel that i'm a useless person, I got controlled by the situation... and I was in the deep deep shit situation now... i just don't know how and what to do to bring myself out from this deep shit situation... I'm struggling to let go whatever i have with me now to move on... I felt like I'm dropping into depression... Sigh~ Sigh~ Sigh~
I have been single for nearly 2 years from now ... Friends surrounded me was curious that why i'm still single after i broke out with my ex-girlfriend for 2 years. I still have no girlfriends and enjoying my single life. My family relative was asking when am i going to get marry?... errrrrr... my answer to them was i'm going to Uganda Africa... how to start a relationship... a long distance relationship is not an easy one... Today, i still haven't found my stable and long term partner that i wanna to spend the rest of my life with even though i have been going out with lots of friends. So, what should i do? ... am i just ignore whatever opportunity i have or just not paying any interest to get one now... Errrr... this is a question that i should seek for the answer on my own... I feel that i need to find out from my inner self...
BTW, people usually mentioned that if you are not doing well in your career ... you may gain something from your relationship. Errrrr.... Why i don't have anything from both side... I totally disagreed on what this saying ... Look @ TZ, he got nothing... no relationship and no stable job ... so what would be his gain? NOTHING... *Sob Sob*
Scroll down to see what TZ's mood now...
Hopefully, this will not bring you down together with me ... I hope after blasting this out i will be feeling better... Errrrr....